Renomania

I've been home for a week now and feel surprisingly ok. Based on the stories I've heard about returning home after two years, I was expecting all kinds of anxiety attacks and sleeping issues and instability, but I feel fine. A little out of step and weird, but fine. Perhaps I'm not yet in the clear, though. Both Reno and Romania feel like imaginary places, like they belong in a book of myths and legends. From Dracula's Backyard to the Biggest Little City: A Tale of Two Towns. Or something like that. I like how Romania feels right now. I love the country in a different, more powerful way now that it's a memory. It's a warm, light place in my brain that, when focused on too intently, can bring tears to the eyes. I hope that feeling never fades.

There was an older Romanian woman on the flight from London to Dallas. She was alone and could speak no English. At Heathrow, I heard her ask a man if he spoke Romanian. After repeating herself three times and getting the response "what?" three times, she gave up and started shuffling through her purse. Her hands shook a little. Surrounded by a sea of English speakers for the first time in two years, I was immediately drawn to her, and found myself clinging to this last little piece of Romania for as long as possible. We found a great deal of comfort in the other's presence and I couldn't help but get choked up as she boarded her plane to Tulsa, Oklahoma an hour before my flight to Reno. Goodbye, Romania. You kept me company all the way to America and I'm very grateful for that.

My mom, sister and sister's boyfriend met me at the airport with a welcome home bouquet and balloons. The length of space between where I could see them and where I could actually hug them seemed to last a decade and I think I may have pushed a few meandering fellow-passengers out of the way. Sorry about that. Tears of joy are strange creatures and I'm still trying to figure them out. Obviously, I have done alot of crying over the past three weeks. Tears for leaving, tears for missing and tears for arriving. But for now, I'm just happy to be home. I've really missed this place.